How to Save Money when You Have Kids: Good Parenting During Tough Economic Times

How to Save Money when You Have Kids: Good Parenting During Tough Economic Times 

Parenting tips that will help your family grow closer during tough financial times 

Kids value your time over the latest gadget 
Children cherish time with their parents more over the latest i-pod, fashion doll, or video game that came out in time for the holiday rush. Adults never lament that they never had that cool remote-controlled car or the newest shoe sensation as a child. What is heard again and again is the lack of time spent with a parent who was either absent or was working too hard to spend time with their child. Make a concerted effort to double the time you spend with your children each week. They will be so excited that mom or dad went with the to the movies, a picnic, or park with them, that they will not gauge your love for them by the toys in their closet. Your children will know that you love them by the time you spend with them.

Back to the basics
Despite all of the brouhaha over the latest electronic educational toys, give a child a ball and a field, and they will be entertained for hours in good, healthy outdoor fun. Sidewalk chalk, bubbles, and jump ropes are other inexpensive childhood staples that have withstood the test of time. Even my savvy inner city students looked forward to the hour each day when they could enjoy the sunshine safely and play with their friends. Other fun games included hula hoop and frisbee. All of these items can easily be found at the nearest dollar store, and the children get some exercise to boot!

Turn the TV off

Children's programming on major network stations targets young audiences for a barrage of new items that are expensive, unhealthy, and sometimes not age-appropriate. Sit down with your child for Saturday morning cartoons and you will see dozens of adds for junk food and candy, sassy fashion dolls, and expensive electronic gadgets that will break after a week of use. These ads not only influence children, but teach them a set of values based on the gaining of faddish material goods. Limit the amount your child watches television and spend quality time with them. Even limiting the number of televisions in the household to one in the family room, instead of one in each bedroom, will not only save you money in cable and television sets, but will automatically ensure automatic parental supervision and less television watching. This also may pertain to computers, which are soon replacing televisions as the entertainment of choice.

Keep communication open
When my parents went bankrupt, they sat my sister and I down and explained our new economic situation in simple terms. They allowed us to voice our concerns (I was about 12, my sister 8). Together, as a family, we decided that certain things - new clothes and toys, private school, and the cars - would have to go if we wanted to save our house. Because they explained the situation to us, we did not complain when we had to shop at Goodwill, when we ate spam and tuna every night for months, or when going to the mall just involved window-shopping. We learned to appreciate the sacrifices our parents made and became better people for it. Be honest with your children about finances.

Good nutrition

During tough economic times it is difficult to keep families well fed. Children and teens seem to need a boundless amount of fuel to keep going, and mounting bills continue to eat into the family grocery budget. Although the temptation may be to stock up on boxes of easy-to-make meals and canned goods, there are ways to save money and still provide good nutrition for your children. Farmer's markets, buying in bulk, brown bag lunches, and cooking up large pots of filling staples (chili, navy bean soup, etc.) are just some ways to keep your kids healthy and full. See the links listed below for ways to save on food costs.

Leading by example
Children learn by emulating their parents. Demonstrate strong character, a loving heart, and wisdom, and your children will follow suit. Avoiding wasteful spending at home and valuing precious quality time will help your family grow, no matter what the financial hardship.

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Shiny Urinals, America, and Latino Pride

This morning I scrubbed a church urinal, and I felt shame welling up within me. My pride ached within my chest. Years of college study, teaching at the university, my national reputation as a composer meant nothing as I succumbed to the worst of Latino stereotypes - the Spanish Maid. A hundred small steps brought me to this place, shining the receptacle of a hundred men's waste. The American economy, high energy bills, one too many vacations this summer, a new baby, a car that is too new, a body that is too old, university budget cuts - all contributing factors. In the end, my husband and I decided that taking care of our child and paying for the necessities was more important than our respective egos. 

I suppose my handsome gringo husband, his mother having to support four children on a janitor's salary alone, gave him a unique perspective on the cleaning job. He understood that children do not judge their parents the way that society, or even our own hearts do. But I had been raised that if you succeed, are the best, and overcome all through hard work and dedication, that you would want for nothing. Even when I chose the least lucrative field of all - the arts - I had foolish faith that as long as I gave my all, all would be already.

But then the economy failed, our old Toyota died, and I gave birth to our new baby girl.  

I spoke with my mom on the phone yesterday about the new cleaning job, along with other happenings from the week - baby took her first steps, I was published in Yahoo!, and I am composing a film score for an art film in California. I admit my relationship with my mom is tenuous. Its been calm for many years now, but I am always afraid that it will revert to the shouting matches of twenty years ago. The child within in me, I suppose, fears for the worst. She reminded me of the time when she scrubbed toilets, a couple of years after she had served as V.P. of my dad's engineering company. There is nothing shameful in taking care of one's family, no matter what the job. 

Jump back one more generation, and I think of Abuelo and Abuela, newly arrived from Cuba. My abuelo, a former medical student in cardiology became a pizza delivery boy, and eventually worked in construction. My abuela, a professional singer in her youth, then a kindergarten teacher (and official seamstress for the Cuban resistance against Castro), worked in a shrimp factory for twenty years. Each day she peeled shrimp in a factory in Miami, along with other new immigrants to America. Abuela had lost a young daughter in Cuba, and never again saw the child's grave once she stepped on American soil.

Sacrifice. Love. Pride.

These adjectives describe any Latino father working a day job so his children can eat for one more day, or the Hispanic mama slaving away in a restaurant kitchen or cleaning a bathroom just to provide a warm bed for her family. Mis hermanos y hermanas, your children do not care if you feed them working at a high paying job or as a janitor. All they care about is that you show them love. Ignore the idiots who try to pin the label "lazy" onto you, just because you speak the mother tongue to your children. The Latino people are hard working, American citizens or Americans citizen-to-be. It is only fear that attempts to keep us down. It is only fear that prevents us from succeeding. It is only shame that we put on ourselves which keeps us from holding our heads up high. 

Next week I will again clean shine the urinals, once again scrub filth, and once again feel the pain welling up within my sinful heart, but this time I will crush the shame and replace it with pride - the same pride that mis abuelos felt as they stepped onto American soil for the first time, the same pride my mother felt as she cleaned the church bathroom decades ago to put food on the table, and the same pride that I feel as I hold my little bebe in my arms, knowing that she and her papa have done all that they can to give her a chance at a healthy and happy life.